I asked myself this question today when faced with a seemingly mundane decision. Do I take the easy way, or the right way?
I used to think that being a strong woman meant always making a stand when you felt something was wrong. I now ask myself, is the strong woman the one who confronts the issue head on, or the one who is also strong enough to walk away?As an extrovert, I often felt that a situation needed to be “righted” by tackling the situation head on and often quite assertively, but now I question this.
As we grow older, we experience so many challenges and situations that we never would have dreamed we would have to deal with. We watch friends live through stories that you thought could only be fiction or based on people far away, not in your world. People who have dealt with marital affairs, partner’s addictions, sickness and death. As I watched how various women dealt with the challenges presented to them, I began to see that the strong person is not always the person who loudly “takes a stand”. She is more often the one who puts her head down and gets on with what needs to be done for her and her family to survive.
Watching friends go through divorces, it is the person that stands tall, does not berate the ex publicly and puts the children first that I admire. I realise that she is stronger and braver than the woman who calls out her husband (although he may well deserve it) – telling anyone in earshot (and sometimes sadly on social media) about the latest list of things he has done wrong to her and their children. We all hurt and, surely he deserves most of what is said, but in the long run, is it best for her? Is it best for her kids?
We face decisions every day and we get to choose the easy way, or the right way – more often than not, they are not the same path.
The strong woman is most likely the woman who looks carefully at her situation and makes the decision that is best for her and those close to her. This is often a private journey. When she makes her decision, she “owns it” and sets out to achieve it her way. It is more often than not, the more difficult path, and it will not always make sense to those on the outside as to why she chose this direction.